Sunday School Stories
STORY OF ELIJAH
The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah the
Prophet and the false prophets of Baal. She explained how Elijah built the
altar, put wood upon it, cut the steer in pieces, and laid it upon the
altar. And then, Elijah commanded the people of God to fill four barrels of
water and pour it over the altar. He had them do this four times.
"Now," said the teacher, "Can anyone in the class tell me why the Lord would
have Elijah pour water over the steer on the altar?"
A little girl in the back of the room started waving her hand, "I know! I
know!" she said, "To make the gravy!"
The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife looked back and
turned into a pillar of salt, when little Jason interrupted, "My Mummy
looked back once, while she was driving," he announced triumphantly, "and
she turned into a telephone pole!"
A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the Good
Samaritan, in which a man was beaten, robbed and left for dead.
She described the situation in vivid detail so her students would catch the
drama. Then, she asked the class, "If you saw a person lying on the
roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?"
A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd throw up."
DID NOAH FISH?
A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of
fishing when he was on the Ark?" "No," replied David J.
"How could he, with just two worms."
A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how
powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a higher power.
Can anybody tell me what it is?" One child blurted out, "Aces!"
MOSES & THE RED SEA
Nine-year-old Joey, was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday
school. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy
lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got
to the Red Sea, he had his army build a pontoon bridge and all the people
walked across safely. Then, he radioed headquarters for reinforcements.
They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved."
"Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked.
"Well, no, Mom. But, if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD
A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the
most quoted passages in the Bible; Psalm 23. She gave the youngsters a month
to learn the verse. Little Rick was excited about the task but, he just
couldn't remember the Psalm. After much practice, he could barely get past
the first line.
On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the
congregation, Rickey was so nervous. When it was his turn, he stepped up to
the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my Shepherd, and that's all I
need to know."
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YOU CAN'T PICK AND CHOOSE
Here is an "urban legend" regarding exams at Cambridge University which is
still fun to read.
It is said that during an examination one day a bright young student
popped up and asked the proctor to bring him Cakes and Ale. The following
Proctor: I beg your pardon?
Student: Sir, I request that you bring me Cakes and Ale.
Proctor: Sorry, no.
Student: Sir, I really must insist. I request and require that you bring
me Cakes and Ale.
At this point, the student produced a copy of the four-hundred-year old
laws of Cambridge, written in Latin and still nominally in effect, and
pointed to the section which read (roughly translated): "Gentlemen sitting
examinations may request and require Cakes and Ale." Pepsi and hamburgers
were judged the modern equivalent, and the student sat there, writing his
examination and happily slurping away.
Three weeks later, the student was fined five pounds for not wearing a
sword to the examination.
When we are study the law, we sometimes are careful to find those things
which may benefit us, while trying to ignore the rest. It happens with the
Bible all the time. Ever known anybody who only quoted the Bible when it
was convenient for them ("Judge not that ye be not judged")? They want to
get their "cakes and ale" but ignore the part about "wearing a sword"?
God's Word isn't like a cafeteria. We don't get to go through and pick out
which parts we want and which parts we don't like.
"For whoever shall keep the whole law, and yet stumble in one point, he is
guilty of all. For He who said, 'Do not commit adultery,' also said, 'Do
not murder.' Now if you do not commit adultery, but you do murder, you
have become a transgressor of the law. So speak and so do as those who
will be judged by the law of liberty." (James 2:10-12)
Take delight in those parts of God's law which give delight, but be ready
to take the responsibility given by the rest of His law as well.
Have a great day!
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